Monday, May 28, 2012

Sometimes It Just Is.

Some days are like this. There is nothing wrong; in fact, its been a quiet, lovely no-pressure day.

And I am in the dumps anyway.

Nothing to see here.

No great trial, no horrible tragedy, no impossible twist of fate to throw me off my feet and render me faceplanted to the earth.

I just feel....small. Of no consequence, of no great merit. Dumpy. Boring. Wormish. Poor Jon, I explain to him the dumpiness of Dumpdom, but how do you explain sticking a metaphorical box over your head and standing in a metaphorical empty room? It doesn't make sense.

There are some great sayings out there about this. "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar" is one of them. "Much ado about nothing" is another. There was a great one that showed up in Peanuts once: "Shut up and leave me alone."

That's probably the best one for today.

It does not make sense for me to feel like this. Nonetheless, I do. And if I were more mature or enlightened, I might take the time and effort to decode it, to defuse it, to deconstruct it and rebuild it into some lovely glitering bauble of self-awareness. Failing that, I would at least take the effort to pull the stinger out, put some ice on it and move on.

But I am not.

So for today, it will just Be. I will try not to let it spill out over the rest of the folks around me, but I will embrace my inner Dumper and keep the stupid little trollwoman inside me company until she picks up her sorry ass and toddles along. She will sit there under the box with messy hair, unwashed face and unbrushed teeth. Maybe she will be picking her nose. Don't care. Don't give a crap. Shut up and leave me alone.

Not every day has to be wonderful or instructional. So there. Nothing to see here.

Let it be.

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