I Want a Disclaimer, Too

I want one of these for my life. "This vehicle not responsible for flying debris."

That pretty much sums it up. But I think I would need a larger sticker:

"This vehicle not responsible for flying emotional debris, jumped conclusions or dropped f-bombs; not culpable for injured feelings, rocked boats, inappropriate behavior, offhand comments, unreasonable requests, unreliable information and intermittent cracks, wise or other; not accountable for occasional gas leakage or other unintended emissions; damage caused by popped buttons, split seams or burst bra straps is not covered by this institution or its subsidiaries; individuals spending time in the company of said vehicle do so at their own risk. The statements, appearance or any other aspect of said vehicle do not represent the views of management and are not admissible in a court of law."

Yep. That'd be a good start.